Can I use the phone?
"Is everything all right," I ask?
"Yeah, uh, no.. can I use your phone? I'm locked out of my house."
I want to be neighborly, and this seems harmless enough. I invite her inside and to make herself at home, then I give her the phone. The conversation I expected is quite divergent from the actuality.
"Hey, it's me, what's up?" ... "Yeah, it's an autoimmune disease where your body attacks your colon" ... "I didn't hurt a lot, but I did bleed a lot." ... "suppository" .... "enema"
After about ten minutes of this, "oh, I'm locked out of my house. Could you come by ASAP?"